No, I'm not back with a brand new invention.
What I do have is an earworm, courtesy of he-who-was-once-popular-in-the-80s.
Will it ever stop? Yo, I don't know.
I sure hope it does, though. But I really, really thought this song was so baaaad (read: terrific) back in the day.
Should I compound my shame by adding that I actually paid to see him in concert way back when? Oops, I guess I already did. OK, I admit it. I paid two weeks' worth of my allowance when I was a teenager to see Vanilla Ice in concert. Just because I totally loved Ice Ice Baby in those days. And I will admit that the song still makes my ass twitch even now.
Stop laughing, you smart alecks. I'll get you. Because I slice like a ninja and cut like a razor blade.
(As you can probably tell, I have more than a passing acquaintance with this song's lyrics. I'm going to go jump off a cliff now.)
Kick it one time, yadda yadda. Go ahead. Sing along if you want to, I won't tell.