Wednesday, August 08, 2007

La misérable



Taking a cue here from Houseband00 and his Eine Kleine Nachtmusik posts.

Otherside
by the Red Hot Chili Peppers

Chorus
How long how long will I slide
Separate my side I don't
I don't believe it's bad
Slit my throat
It's all I ever

I heard your voice through a photograph
I thought it up it brought up the past
Once you know you can never go back
I've got to take it on the otherside

Centuries are what it meant to me
A cemetery where I marry the sea
Stranger things could never change my mind
I've got to take it on the otherside
Take it on the otherside
Take it on
Take it on

Chorus
How long how long will I slide
Separate my side I don't
I don't believe it's bad
Slit my throat
It's all I ever

Pour my life into a paper cup
The ashtray's full and I'm spillin' my guts
She wants to know am I still a slut
I've got to take it on the otherside

Scarlet starlet and she's in my bed
A candidate for my soul mate bled
Push the trigger and pull the thread
I've got to take it on the otherside
Take it on the otherside
Take it on
Take it on

Chorus
How long how long will I slide
Separate my side I don't
I don't believe it's bad
Slit my throat
It's all I ever

Turn me on take me for a hard ride
Burn me out leave me on the otherside
I yell and tell it that
It's not my friend
I tear it down I tear it down
And then it's born again

Chorus
How long how long will I slide
Separate my side I don't
I don't believe it's bad
Slit my throat
It's all I ever had
I don't believe it's bad
Slit my throat
It's all I ever...


The saying "misery loves company" used to perplex me, until I found out what it meant, that when a person is unhappy he or she takes pleasure in the fact that other people are unhappy too. A relative of schadenfreude, it is.

But I don't take pleasure in the fact that other people are unhappy too when I'm unhappy. The kind of misery I experience is whore-like, in that she's so easy to distract and please. In the right kind of company, the kind of company I need at a certain moment, I'm filled with happy beans and nothing in the universe can drag me back down to earth. During those moments misery isn't part of the company.

Or so I think.

Because that multi-faceted motherfucker who goes by the alluring and somehow romantic name of Misery manages to make her presence felt even when I'm dancing (figuratively speaking, of course) in the heights of happiness. Not that she's ever blatant about it; she's one subtle bitch.

Because when I hear certain songs, see certain images... even when I hear the voice or laugh of a person in whose company I see the stars doing the cha-cha, whose presence fills me with uncompromising, delirious joy, the ghost of misery whispers in my ear or lands on my skin, like a spiderweb -- its softness belying its strength and persistence.

And in those joyful moments the truth is borne to me: that my joy's feet are clay (cheap one at that), that the source of elation is no more tangible than the smoke curling from the tip of my cigarette, that the source of this (fleeting) happiness is in reality worth nothing. Zilch, diddly-squat, bullshit.

Screw you, Misery, for ruining the experiences in which I normally find solace. Like the rain. (And it's been raining nearly nonstop here the past few days.) But bless you, Misery, for making me see it in a way I've never seen before. Cleansing rain. Independent rain.

Oh, well. C'est la vie.. But it still sucks the big one. No worries, my sunny nature will overcome this darkly unfathomable dreaming, I know. Next up, a meme from Frank!

29 comments:

~*SilverNeurotic*~ said...

I adore that song, and the Chili Peppers in general...however, the song always reminds me of one of my ex's...and well, he wasn't the happiest person (nor was/am I)...song brings back many good/bad memories.

kyels said...

Misery likes company; all of us like companies too. But it does not mean that if one is unhappy, he/she should pull others into the realm of unhappiness.

Well, this song is hauntingly beautiful.

Diesel said...

I used to feel that way all the time. Then I started taking Prozac.

Travis said...

I'm not an RHCP fan - no reason, just never liked them.

But I am certainly glad I scrolled on down. You have such an amazing way with language.

"...the ghost of misery whispers in my ear or lands on my skin, like a spiderweb -- its softness belying its strength and persistence."

Now that's poetry. I understood the substance of the post as well, but the writing - truly moving.

Daddy Papersurfer said...

OK - when you're down, think of my avatar - my trousers round my ankles, a tampon in each ear, trying to scratch my butt with the terrible Goddess kicking my shins.
Now, either you'll laugh a bit and feel better or you'll feel sorry for me and feel a bit better. Win win for a little while anyway.

Glamourpuss said...

Ah yes, I know it well. There are some who say that one needs the Misery to heighten the joy. Personally, I'd like the opportunity to find if that's true or not.

Puss

nursemyra said...

dearest lizza, hope that mistress misery leaves you alone for a little while soon.

I know it's the pits but we're all rooting for you (in the nicest way)

Bond said...

Kick Misery's ass Lizza...

As Travis said.. pure poetry

Natalia said...

I always liked that phrase. And I believe without misery we wouldn't appreciate joy as much.

And I look forward to the meme.

-N

H said...

Okaaaaaaay Liza darling,

just love the imagery of the source of your elation being like the smoke curling at the tip of your cig. Almost makes smoking desirable and it definitely makes your writing an absolute pleasure to experience.

But y'know, misery is equally zichy and diddly squatish bullshit like, if your asking, Kick it in its balls baby.

Hugs to you darling sis. Iknow you're soooo going to kick its arse. [I'm thinking smack my bitch up is a better song, y'know]

Mimi Lenox said...

It took me a moment to even formulate a response to this post. Deeply moved.
Stunning words, my dear.

Nice said...

aaawww... whatever makes you miserable now will definitely be over soon. u're right, your sunny disposition will help you get through it. nice post, girl. very enlightening!

it's the little things... said...

RHCP is my very favorite band. But like your first commenter, that song brings back memories from a bad time for me too.
Great imagery today, Lizza!

zeroimpact said...

I try to make others happy whenever I can
So I can be a company loved by misery and in hopes of cheering up misery as well
:)

houseband00 said...

Misery does love company, but so does Joy. =)

Cheer up, kid.

Natalie said...

I always thought it sometimes took other miserable people to make you feel like you weren't the only miserable person around and then you would feel better. Or something like that.

Daddy Papersurfer said...

And stop picking holes in my llama!!

Tammie Jean said...

I totally agree with Travis - that line is pure genius. Damn you're good!

But I also loved that you called misery a multi-faceted motherfucker LOL!

You are awesome Lizza :) I hope you're feeling better.

Tammie Jean said...

(And I don't know what in the world daddy papersurfer is talking about, but his llama comment made me laugh out loud!)

Red hot chili pinay in barnsley said...

Inday, bakit lesmiz ka these days?

I'll try & log on MSN tonight & see if you're there. Matagal tagal na rin tayong walang chika.

BTW, I love the healthy dose of 'naughty adult' words in this post! Not very Lizza like but I'm likin it!!!

Odat said...

Ah, I know that feeling well....when right smack dab in the middle of something that makes us so happy.....bam...it's there...
Sometimes it just takes time to be over with it and sometimes it just there for a reason....
Kick it's ass Lizza!
Peace

Turnbaby said...

""the ghost of misery whispers in my ear or lands on my skin, like a spiderweb -- its softness belying its strength and persistence.""

Just achingly lovely---

Lizza said...

Thanks, everybody, for your lovely and encouraging comments. I'm all better now. It was just a funk.

And I do cuss from time to time here. Thanks for putting up with it.

Daddy Papersurfer said...

Is that it?
I've had these tampons in my ears for hours now and that's all you've got to say! They might be handy for your next post - they are a little waxy but cerviceable.

Lizza said...

Cervix-able? *giggle*

Thanks for the offer (I think). You're just too thoughtful.

eastcoastdweller said...

Lizza, I just wandered into Your blog from my east coast and I am quite struck by Your gift of words, delightfully seasoned with just the right amount of salt.

You write beautifully.

Misery --- can't live with it, can't live without it.

Lizza said...

Thank you very much, eastcoastdweller. So glad to make your acquaintance. I've taken a peek at your blog and bookmarked it for further reading. I like what I've seen so far!

eastcoastdweller said...

May I link Your blog to mine, Lizza? I'd love to share Your wit and wisdom with my blog community.

Lizza said...

Feel free to link, eastcoastdweller. And thanks!