Lists

It's been said that there are two certainties in life: death and taxes.

I think whoever said that should've also mentioned lists. Is there anyone who does not make a list of something at least once a week? TV shows or movies to watch, blogs to read, food to eat (or avoid), books to buy, bills to pay, things to buy at the supermarket. A list doesn't even have to be written down; lots of times they're just in our minds.

And who's to say they didn't exist even in the minds of Prehistoric Man?

Things to do today:
1. Set out with other cavemen to hunt woolly mammoth.
2. Kill woolly mammoth.
3. Divide spoils of killed woolly mammoth with co-hunters.
4. Bring share of woolly mammoth home to hearth.
5. Exhibit manliness thrustingly to hearth mate with no preliminaries.

Of course, it could've worked both ways. The Prehistoric Woman of the Hearth could've had her own list for the day in mind:
1. Prepare hunting-man's breakfast and meal that he can bring along to the hunt.
2. Bathe and feed children of the hearth.
3. Dry herbs and other plants for winter.
4. Make winter/summer/fall/spring/summer clothing for hearth's hunting-man and children.
5. Bring hunting-man's spoils into the hearth; cure leather, preserve what needs to be preserved.
6. Heat hunting-man's dinner (no microwave ovens then, alas!).
7. Make praising noises as hunting-man recounds his hunting exploits.
8. Clean auroch-bone eating implements that hunting-man used during dinner.
9. Stoke the hearth's main fire since hunting-man seems to be too exhausted from hunting to do it.
10. Quell questions about hunting-man's allegations about exhaustion while accommodating his "request" for oral affection in the bed furs, since he's too tired for anything else (e.g., preliminaries for her benefit)
11. Make loud grunting noises to make hunting-man feel he's great at something aside from hunting woolly mammoths, while praying to the Earth/Sky/Water/Fire goddesses and all heavenly dieties past and present that hunting-man would reach the heavenly hunting grounds as soon as possible so she can go to sleep
12. Clean her teeth with twigs and mint with hunting-man snoring in the bed furs in the background. And try to ignore the fact that he didn't use his twigs and mint before he went to sleep.

Fictional scenario, of course.

Let's move on to modern lists, cyber-age lists, lists that make you wonder how the powers that be gathered their data, lists that encompass the whole of Planet Earth.

from Men's Health

Congratulations to my UK blog buddies. DaddyP, GlamourPuss, GhostRose, Aunty Helpful Dictator, Donna, Yaxlich. You guys hardly let on that you're living in a nation that's rocka-rocka spectacular. (My country's in the top five, hee hee!)

Best wishes to Sanni, who'll be moving from Germany to London. Maybe little Luis will have a brother or sister soon. ;-) And for those who'll be leaving or have left the UK, hope you don't forget to bring the nookie with ya!

Oh, and Penfold gets special mention because of a subtle remark possibly implying he's well-endowed. Of course it's entirely possible that I inferred mistakenly. He's from England, but he lives in Portugal. (Both countries rate an "A" though, for spectacular sex. How cool is that?)

Hmmm, I don't have any blog buddies from Poland and Romania, two of the countries in the list's top five. Maybe I'll go look for some. Just for cultural information exchange purposes, you understand.

P.S. Dunno how and where they got their figures. Results may not be agreeable to everyone. Who the heck cares. :-) This is just for fun. Not slighting anybody here.